(NOTE: This entry guest blogged by Johnhp)
The Republican party of Illinois has just admitted they can't field a candidate from Illinois. They are on the verge of inviting Alan Keyes to lose in November against Barak Obama. Obama had a 20 point lead over Jack Ryan before the latter dropped out of the Illinois Senate race.
You may have heard the story. Mr. Ryan allegedly asked his wife to perform oral sex on him in front of people at a sex club. When she tearfully refused he reportedly told her that she was ruining his mood. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh compassionate conservatism.
At any rate the Republicans have yet to field a candidate. They tried to get Mike Ditka to run but he didn't. Today they interviewes a dozen or so people for the job. One of those, Alan Keyes of Maryland. i hope Keyes stays out. i couldn't care less that he is from maryland. Our constitution allows for him to become a resident of the state any time up to and including the day of the election.
i have my heart set on the choice of another candidate. Daniel R. Vovak. He is new to Illinois (only lived here for a week), but he has something none of the other candidates have. No, not a chance to win; NONE of them have that. Mr. Vovak wears a powdered wig and lives in his Mustang convertable (he calls it "Air Ford One"). i can see the debates now...
If you are all as interested as i am in seeing something like this, please send emails of support for Mr. Vovak to the Chair of the Illinois GOP. Her name is Judy Baar Topinka. firstname.lastname@example.org